Since I have a largish immediate family (1 sister, 3 brothers), there's been some light-hearted competition over who gets to be the favorite uncle to M and L. Having taken on the nanny position, I'm of course comfortably in the lead now, especially where L is concerned (M needing more discipline from time to time, it's unclear whether I'll come out ahead in the long run). Now, being the generous type, I offered an incentive program to my brothers. For a suitable fee, I would insert the adjective of their choice in front of all instances of the name of their choice in conversation with the children. For instance, Uncle A could purchase Awesome Uncle A, or more nefariously, Stinky Uncle L. Sadly, no one took me up on this offer; A theorizing that it would be more cost-effective to bribe the parents. The parents, of course, are unbribeable; Mercenery Uncle D, not so much.

I'll note that it's not too late to act on this special offer. Stinky Uncle L ought to be particularly interested. Oh, and while we're on the subject, M occasionally likes to fantasize about what cars he will buy his relatives when he makes a million billion dollars. Me, I'm content with the convertible E-series Mercendes-Benz I've been promised, but Aunt S, for instance, may want to consider whether she wants to end up with a Chevrolet station wagon or a Dodge Viper convertible sports car...